But life’s not easy, you can’t just pass up everything you just don’t feel like doing. And you know, a lot of things you want and you don’t want to do.
(Ok, here’s a semi-truth that I just came to think of as I wrote the title for this post, and I just had to put this in here, as a little thought, before everything: I don’t really know what that symbol # means. I was so sure that it meant ‘number’, so that it would be ‘Truth number 1’. But then I tried to check it up online, and I couldn’t find anything to support my knowledge, so then I was like, huh, maybe I’m wrong! So, yeah, maybe you could tell me? I know that it’s like hashtag, but I also thought it meant number. Please let me know.)
Truth is, I’m tired, it’s late, I just got back home, I really want to go to bed, and I don’t really wanna write this. I know, I know that was like many truths in one, but the main one is: I don’t want to write this. But I’m still doing it. Because LIFE is a lot about things you don’t really want to do. If I’m not able to write a little truth on the web the first day of my resolution (or whatever), then I feel as if I’m gonna be in big trouble when it comes to real stuff, when it comes to life. Hey sometimes I feel as if, I don’t really want to do this: Life. And if I would give up on such a simple task as a blog post, I would be one step closer to giving up on life. And I don’t wanna go there again.
I guess there’s many people claiming that we should stop doing things we don’t want to do. And I agree and I disagree. You shouldn’t be someone you’re not, definitely not. You shouldn’t hang around with people you hate, or play golf if that makes you squirm. But life’s not easy, you can’t just pass up everything you just don’t feel like doing. And you know, a lot of things you want and you don’t want to do. For instance this blog post, I don’t want to do it, because I’m tired; because I would rather sleep; because WTF am I gonna write about; because no one will read it; because my stomach hurts a little, but I do want to do it, because I want to follow up on the resolution I made; because I know that I thought writing a truth a day was a good idea, and even though I can’t see it now, I’ll believe the person I was when I made that decision; because the thought of someone praising me for it sounds appealing; because I know I would feel good about doing it. So really it’s not that you don’t want to do a lot of the things, but it’s that you both want and don’t want, and the wanting part is stronger (but without you necessarily seeing it so clearly).
And then there are things we need to do. Though, the things we need to do, is probably a lot about ‘want’ too. For instance, I need to wash my clothes, because I want to have clean clothes. You get my drift.
But then there are things that you don’t want to do on any point, and things you don’t need to do on any point, and those things, honestly, just quit them.
For not wanting to write a single word this post got quite long. But I guess I concluded with that I wanted to write it after all. Maybe everything is ambivalent (in addition to relative, because everything is relative). Hey, sorry for spewing ridiculous thoughts out here, I don’t even know if I was able to follow myself.