I stay up at night. Way longer than I should. Because I’m afraid of oversleeping. Because once I go to bed I know I’ll just want to stay there forever. In a strange way I think it’s better to sleep 4 hours before I have to get up than to get 9 hours. I don’t really see the logic. But that is what happens over and over.
I don’t wanna go into my bedroom, turn off the lights and just lie there feeling the anxiety taking over. I exhaust myself, even when I know that I have to get up early. Because I don’t wanna spend any more time than necessary feeling anxious and worried, and hopeless.
I have even a harder time sleeping when I have an appointment in the morning/noon the next day. Because of the oversleeping thing, and I don’t know, because I already start worrying about meeting my therapist, doctor, or whomever I’m having an appointment with.
This was all BULLSHIT. Thanks for reading.