My last breath

I’ve been AWOL for a while … but what does it matter.

I wish I could write words that would make a difference, that I somehow could extend my support, and my outreached hand through comforting words. Or even just a recounting of my own experiences … but what does it matter. What does any of it matter!? I’m not a wizard of words, I’m nothing but yet another human being. I’m worthless.

So you there, if you’re reading this, tell me I’m wrong, tell me it matters! … Or don’t, because you know just as well as me, that it doesn’t.


15 thoughts on “My last breath

  1. NO! You matter. You do. You are not worthless. It matters. Trust me, it – your everything – does.


      • Because I feel that way about myself. And it’s such a crappy feeling.
        And hearing someone else say it; I desperately want all their feelings to go away. Even if I don’t know you, I care.

        You could go ahead and say “you should care about yourself” but goodness knows if I’ll be capable of doing so

      • Exactly. I struggle to know why myself.

        I think the fact that I can relate really kicked in when I read your post. In a scary way, the fact that I can relate, but haven’t changed my thoughts on a personal level, means that I’m quite helpless here. Futile, one could say.

        But still. I care

        (I truly am Sorry if I’ve upset you, though.)

      • Hi, You (I don’t know what to call you?)

        You didn’t upset me. You cheered me up. Truthfully, to the bottom of my heart. I’m sorry if I made it sound like I was mad at you, I wasn’t, not at all!

        Thank you for caring. It means a lot. Thanks for telling me. I’m sorry that you can relate, I wish no one could ever relate to this kind of pain. See you around? I’m Marie btw. Hugs!

      • I’m Z 🙂
        I wasn’t sure whether I had; and I had no intention of hurting you. Glad I didn’t 🙂

        It’s hard, because I sound so hypocritical and all – primarily due to the fact that I’m going through a lot of icky stuff right now. It’s emotionally draining.
        But I do genuinely mean it; I care 🙂


      • Hi Z!

        And no! No, you’re not hypocritical. I’m the same. I understand you! We want all the best for others, but we’re not able to want it for ourselves. We’ve been hurt so much we find it impossible to believe that someone could wish us well, because we think it’s true what they said, that we deserve the pain. But Z, you don’t!
        Thank you for caring. I care about you too! I’m sorry to hear you’re going through icky stuff, I really wish it was just rainbows, and puppies!

        if you wanna talk, I’ll be here.

    • Oh, S!

      These words matter very much. They are so few, but if they are heartfelt they cheer me up a lot. I have a hard time believing that you were wondering about me, but if you were, thank you for caring! I hope you’re okay too!
      I haven’t been able to keep updated on all your posts, as I wrote in my post, I’ve been quite out of the world. Or maybe out of the cyber-world, and more in the real world. I’m gonna update on them soon, though, I promise!

      You wanna meet up for coffee some day?

  2. You don’t have to know a person directly to employ compassion for them. For those of us who can relate, who know all too well the degree of pain, lonliness and suffering that depression can bring, how can we not feel empathetic? How can we not see our own sufferings in yours and want to support and cheer you on? There aren’t too many people who get, or would admit to knowing what this incessant dark cloud that hovers over us is like. For those of us that do it’s important we support one another. In doing so, we’re also supporting ourselves. We have to stick together! I hope, whatever it may be you’re going through, that you keep marching forward and fighting to get through it. And just know, even though I don’t know you beyond these words on my screen, I’m cheering for you and fighting right along side you!

    • Oh, wow! Thank you!
      Thank you for taking the time to comment, to type this all out, and for caring. I wish so much that you couldn’t relate! But you’re right, you do, and we should all cheer each other on! I wish we all could have a vacation from the pain! Why can’t we say, so long sucker, I’m going on a holiday, and then go off into the world without the suffering! I wish.
      Thanks. Hugs!

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